We need to reflect and admit how violent we all are. When we talk about violence, we are, the majority of the time, thinking about the violence perpetrated by others, but we completely ignore our own violence. It would be beneficial to pause and ask ourselves, “In what ways are we violent? In what ways do we contribute to violence in the world?”

To begin with, we have to look at history and see how we may have benefited from the plundering that took place through the historical oppression and exploitation of others, and the occupation, appropriation, and spoliation of lands and resources that were not ours. We need to own the fact that some of us have been the beneficiaries of a system built on the lives of others. We have to recognize that we belong to a group that benefits from the unjust ways we have organized ourselves to live in society. We have to realize that the goods we buy may have been manufactured by oppressed and exploited workers. We have to be aware that we are enjoying freedoms and privileges that others aren't, and recognize that we are the ones who have put in place organizations, structures, and repressive systems that maintain such privileges, and deprive others from enjoying them. We have to realize that we benefit from this unfair system, and that, in many ways, we contribute to this institutional violence.

We also have to recognize that we live immersed in a highly individualistic and competitive culture that promotes excessive and unnecessary consumption, praises go-getters, and glorifies winners, even those who use deceit to defeat others. We are living in a self-centered culture, where everything is about me, and where not enough people think in terms of we. We are violent people living in a violent world. The signs of violence are visible everywhere but we don’t see them because we have been immersed in them for so long. We don’t see how intensely we compete, how fast we move, how demanding we are, and how we use others for our own advancement and comfort.

We must also reflect on the violence perpetrated by the groups we belong to. We must realize how we separate ourselves in all forms of clans, tribes, gangs, countries, nations, ideologies, religions, and so on, and how we use violence to impose our ideas, our ways, and all sorts of arrangements that benefit us. We like to think of ourselves as being nonviolent, but we must recognize that we are the ones paying others to go out and wage violence on our behalf.

There is a difference between the use of force to attack and the use of force to protect. Peacemakers must develop a good understanding of the difference between the two. Many times, the use of force to expand influence—to conquer, dominate, subjugate, and even punish others—is presented as force being used to protect, but that is a common lie, used all the time by those who benefit from violence. Although I condemn the indiscriminate use of violence, I am not against the use of force as a last resort to save lives. Lives must be protected, and we have to achieve the goal of protecting lives without ending other lives in the process, because all lives are sacred. We have to stop people from killing without killing.

The truth is that we don't even notice how violent we are, and how we contribute to violence in unexpected ways, but we have to recognize that, right now, we are violent people living in a violent world.

Piero Falci teaches Mindfulness Meditation and Mindful Living and the acclaimed Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) program. He leads Insight Meditation Silent Retreats and organizes Silent Peace Walks. Piero is an educator who believes that the inner work that leads to personal awakening and transformation is indispensable to create a wholesome world. He is a promoter of peace who believes in advancing the idea that Heaven is here if we want it to be. He is the author of "Silent Peace Walk: From Inner Peace to World Peace." His latest book is "A Better Life in a Better World: Can Mindfulness Save Us from Ourselves?" For more information, visit his website www.pierofalci.com