We gathered in circle with women in prison for our fifth session of Traveling with the Turtle.  The topic of the day: conflict resolution. We were alarmed when members of the group shared with us how difficult it was for them to work for one of the male supervisors at the job center because he would regularly ogle them and make demeaning, sexist remarks.   

The next time we met, we raised the issue with the women, asking them if they wanted us to file a complaint on their behalf.  They told us in no uncertain terms that such an action would make their life much more difficult because it is impossible to file such a complaint anonymously. After we had completed this conversation, we were amazed at what one woman was able to accomplish on her own when she spoke with this supervisor.  She told us that when he made one of his usual comments to her, she told him that he should not be treating people like that.  He paused for a moment and then replied: “No, I shouldn’t.”  

Clearly this woman, and probably other women in the group, was capable of transforming a violent, unjust situation into a moment of grace.  She used the Two Hands of Nonviolence that we had discussed in an earlier session.  With one hand, she stood up for herself, declaring: “Stop the violence.  Stop treating me in this way.  I am a human being, deserving of your respect.” With her other hand, however, she reached out to him: “Whether I like it or not, I am connected to you.  You are my brother and I believe that you can do better than that.” She spoke her truth with calmness and conviction and it was received.  Truly, the Holy One was present in this interaction. 

Each week, we chant our mantra: “We are good, beautiful, strong and holy.” Traveling with the Turtle: Women’s Spirituality and Peacemaking Program (TWT) creates a safe, sacred space for women to recognize their divinity and innate goodness, experience validation and healing, and learn ways to transform their anger and situations of interpersonal conflict. Like this woman, participants begin to advocate for themselves and each other. 

Our program continues to grow—the Turtle, she keeps on traveling. We currently offer our process to women living in prison, jail, shelters and transitional housing in the San Francisco Bay Area. If you are interested in bringing Traveling with the Turtle to women living in similar settings in your own community or in facilitating a group at your church or for your women’s circle, we invite you to attend our first Facilitator Training, October 24-26, in Oakland, CA. We will gather from Friday, 5:30p.m. to Sunday, 4 p.m. For those of you who need to familiarize yourself with the TWT process, there will be an Introductory Workshop that Friday. For more info: Contact Cindy at cindypile [at] paceebene [dot] org“>cindypile@paceebene.org or (510) 268-8908.